Stopping addictions and bad habits with brute force rarely, if ever, works (at least not long term).
Because the origin of the force is coming from that very web of beliefs that made it happen in the first place.
In other words, you are trying to pull yourself out of the ocean with a rod that YOU throw to catch yourself and pull yourself up.
It doesn’t work like that.
The thing that is exerting the force to change IS the thing to be changed.
This never works.
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Understand, your beliefs, indoctrinations, and habits are within your mind. The subconscious mind.
And within there, if you use conscious force to change something, it might initially work…
… but at some point, another part of that web of beliefs will eventually come in and bring it all in its old “balance” again.
This is also why it is said that people never change.
Because the change is initiated from the mind. Not from the thing outside of the mind.
“And what is that outside thing, Alexander?”
Awareness. Spirit. Soul.
Did you ever notice that sometimes you randomly gain insight into something. You suddenly understand something on a new level.
This is the soul.
The Mind cannot understand itself differently all of a sudden, because it is not observing itself.
The Mind EXISTS WITHIN awareness.
Within the soul.
But this also yields the key.
To solve any and all issue you need to stop using force (the mind) and use awareness (the thing OBSERVING the mind).
We say we are “too close to ourselves to truly notice flaws.”
This is because we are using the mind.
When you look at a friend or a loved one, you notice ALL the mistakes which constantly elude them.
You are using AWARENESS of OBSERVING the other thing (the other person or you yourself) to see what’s truly going on. Detached from the web of beliefs and emotions inside of it.
The key lies in this.
How to Use Awareness to Solve All Issues
You JUST observe.
And nothing else.
Leo Gura famously said (I think he got it from someone else also): Awareness Alone is Curative.
Meaning, just being aware of the things you don’t want to do is enough to eventually stop it.
But do NOT mistake awareness for knowledge.
You KNOW that watching porn is bad.
You KNOW that smoking cigarettes or drinking alcohol is bad.
You KNOW these things.
Did this ever stop you from doing it?
But are you AWARE of what you’re doing WHILE you are doing it?
Fully AWARE of all that comes from it?
The Mind is a master at blocking out our awareness when we do things that are bad.
We do these bad habits because we’re used to it. The ego HATES change. Because change means a loss of control.
And control is the MAIN thing the ego needs.
Because the ego is driven by insecurities.
If you see a person with a “huge” ego, you see they are VERY concerned with controlling everything in their life. Everyone and everything needs to work in predictable patterns, otherwise, they get mad/angry.
A Sage or detached person does not control anything.
They do not care about change, because life for them is not focused on the result/outcome of it as it is for the egoistical person.
For them, life is to be experienced.
Whatever comes by.
Thus, the ego drives you to do these bad things because of the predictable outcome: a dopamine rush from porn, a relaxed feeling after a cigarette, the open self while being drunk, more dopamine from a high calorie fatty meal, etc.
And then it proceeds to ignore what comes from it:
- A feeling of shame and guilt for PMO, bad sexual performance, and a numbed mind
- Cancer, foul breath, elevated heart rate, and destroying the body from smoking
- The hangover, embarrassing stuff you do, and destroyed livers from alcohol
- The full stomach, the bad rest, and becoming fat from overeating
And herein lies the key.
With awareness you DO NOT stop any of this.
I am NOT telling you to stop any of these habits right now. That would be using force again. The mind.
I want you to OBSERVE PRECISELY what is happening.
ALL the emotions, sitting alone in a dark room, opening pornhub to see genitals. Getting aroused by it. The lust. The energy. As well as the orgasm, the bad feeling afterward, the PRESSURE you feel next time you have sex, the guilt when you can’t get it up, etc.
ALL the emotions of eating that bad food. How greasy it looks, how it goes down your throat. How you feel afterwards. How you feel the next day, looking into the mirror.
Remember, you’re NOT judging it or telling yourself you should stop it.
You only note it.
Be aware of it.
Trust me, the more aware of what you are doing, the less able are you to do it.
Now, this isn’t done as a one-off. This is what makes this so hard.
You will need to exert awareness all day, every day.
It’s a muscle that can be trained.
Over time, whatever bad habits you have, you will become fully aware of it.
Because here is the kicker:
If you WERE fully aware of what you’re doing, it would be IMPOSSIBLE to indulge in bad habits.
Read that again.
IMPOSSIBLE is chosen intentionally.
Your awareness, your soul, would not be ABLE to do any of it because you would be so disgusted by it.
Only through the blocking out of your awareness by the web of beliefs and emotions within your mind, did this ever become possible
(and, well, decades of indoctrination ).
THIS IS subconscious self sabotage.
The subconscious is part of the mind, operating mostly on emotions and symbolism.
And even if you exert force to change, eventually, insecurities will drive you back into the same pattern.
Now, I don’t want you to hate your (subconscious) mind.
It’s super powerful. Imagine you would have to take care of your heart pumping, the blood flowing, or even noticing new behavior in others subconsciously (read: intuitively, automated).
That would be a lot.
It IS a very powerful companion.
It is just infested with a weak, insecure mind, driving it to do all the bad things.
Your Awareness is the Master.
The Father looking over his child.
You’re not scolding your child.
You’re telling it what it’s doing wrong and how it could enjoy a better life.
See you soon,